“You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
Imagine yourself as a piece of clay. As your life journey unfolds in front of you, the clay gradually (and sometimes not so gradually) changes shape but does not disappear. Your loss — the one you are grieving right now — changed your clay-shape significantly and will continue to do so. You became stronger — and, alas, also weaker. You became bolder — and more afraid. Notice and embrace these changes. Although often contradictory, they are all part of your healing. Your scars are part of you — whether markers of physical injury or injury-of-the-heart. In the same way as our bodies are not the same after childhood injuries, after pregnancy and childbirth, after accidents and mishaps, neither are our hearts. And being changed by loss, being shaped by grief, is both inevitable and honourable.