“Age teaches resignation; grief teaches itself to be, to just be, because it turns out that it can’t be outrun or forgotten.” — Sharon Butala (Where I Live Now: A Journey through Love and Loss to Healing and Hope)
Often after a death or other loss, major decisions have to be made. Should I move? Should I stay? Would I feel better if I didn’t see reminders of him every where I look? Can I do this myself? Do I need help? My family says this. I think that. Or do I? I don’t even know what I think. There is wisdom in the old adage of not making major changes in the first year after a death and yet, often we find these decisions are pressing and cannot be delayed.
Regardless of whether you stay put or make the major decision to leave the home, the farm, the city, the place where you shared life with your loved one, know that your grief goes with you. Your grief just is. Or as Sharon Butala says, “grief teaches itself to be, to just be.”
Allow yourself to be as well. Your story continues to be written. One word. One line. One page at a time.
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