“Love is flower like; Friendship is like a sheltering tree.” — Samuel Taylor Coleridge After my mother died, a dear friend gave me a pendant necklace engraved with a tree. No card, just a pale yellow sticky note with the above quote, “Friendship is like a sheltering tree.” I rarely see this friend face-to-face as we … Read More
“When all else fails, take a nap” — unknown (or maybe Mom) In addition to working as a counsellor and writing for Suddenly Single Survival Guide, I’m also an avid photographer. Having learned with a film camera, I have embraced digital photography wholeheartedly. But, as much as I love my camera, it does not work if … Read More
“You will lose someone you can’t live without, and your heart will be badly broken, and the bad news is you never completely get over the loss of your beloved. But this is also the good news. They live forever in your broken heart that doesn’t seal back up. And you come through. It’s like … Read More
“You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.” – Elisabeth Kubler-Ross Imagine yourself as a piece of clay. As your life journey unfolds in front of … Read More
“Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak knits up the o-er wrought heart and bids it break.” – William Shakespeare (Macbeth) I once purchased a book with the title Give Sorrow Words having no idea that this phrase was quoting Shakespeare. I guess I missed that in Macbeth. The phrase, however, is wise counsel. … Read More
“Age teaches resignation; grief teaches itself to be, to just be, because it turns out that it can’t be outrun or forgotten.” — Sharon Butala (Where I Live Now: A Journey through Love and Loss to Healing and Hope) Often after a death or other loss, major decisions have to be made. Should I move? Should I … Read More
“I am rather like a mosquito in a nudist camp; I know what I want to do, but I don’t know where to begin.” ― David Allen (Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity) Grief is paralyzing. You know you need to do something but you are too overwhelmed to do anything more than sit … Read More
“Many grieving people simply suffer alone in the weirdness of grief, wondering if they’ve lost their minds on top of everything else.” — Megan Devine (www.refugeingrief.com) Grief is a full body and brain experience. Nothing feels right. Nothing feels normal. You can’t think. You can’t remember where you put your glasses or that the electricity bill … Read More
“Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.” — Marcus Tullius Cicero (Roman Orator) From the beginning of time, people have supported each other during a time of bereavement. One person suffers a loss; another provides the strength to carry on. Some grievers reach out to … Read More
“You’ve got to trust yourself. Be gentle with yourself. And listen to yourself. You’re the only person who can get you through this now. You’re the only one who can survive your story, the only one who can write your future. All you’ve got to do, when you’re ready, is stand up, {and begin again.}” … Read More
“He was swimming in a sea of other people’s expectations. Men had drowned in seas like that.” ― Robert Jordan, New Spring Whether the expectations are yours or other people’s, grief always includes things to do and things left undone. And, although Robert Jordan uses the pronoun he, drowning in a sea of expectations is NEVER … Read More
“I can do Hard Things” is a popular quote right now and yet, no one knows who to attribute it to. One of our focus group of widows said “always do the hard things” is her one bit of advice to new widows. Hard things come in many categories and across time. What is a … Read More
